A Fresh Start

Things have been crazy here in the valley. We just finished moving from Florida all the way across the country to Oregon. My husband and I drove our van and a uhaul the entire seven day journey with our three daughters.

Let me just say, "Three kids, three colds, one mini-van, seven days...I don't ever want to move again!"

Some of my family is in Oregon, but we had to leave his family and my mom behind in Florida. I feel terrible that we had to leave, but I know it was the best thing. We don't want to settle for suburban wasteland that gives us little and takes too much. Our dreams cannot be accomplished there, our family cannot flourish there.

The past few years have not been easy for us, but I see that things are going to get better. I don't know what God has in store for us but I am excited for our fresh start!

Oh that We May be Holy!

I am back -at least I hope to be back- to the world of blogging. All of my energy has been spent trying to persevere in our quest to create/develope/manitain, good Catholic family life, amid all the disrruption and stress we have been enduring this past year. It seems that the good Lord has decided to bless us with a number of trials (by which I hope he means to increase our faith). So we have been in cacoon so to speak.

I thank God that he has given me such a loving and devoted husband who is concerned for his family's temporal and spiritual welfare. We are a good team. Sometimes we get a bit malancholy over how much we have to learn though. So much that used to be routine in family life has been thrown out. What for many used to be "just the way things are" is now nearly forgotten. For those who were not fortunate enough to be raised in a traditional Catholic home, it is not as easy as doing what mom and dad always did. We eagerly dig through books, observe, and apply principles to discover how a Catholic family should live. Books like The Story of a Family, and other lives of the saints, are very helpful, but it isn't the same as having lived it. In Wisconsin we were blessed with the ability to observe many great Catholic families, and they were wonderful sources of friendship, inspiration and support. Now that we find ourselves in Florida, we know no large families (Catholic or otherwise).

What I long to give my children is a home where their hearts and minds are drawn to God. I want them to feel comfortable and safe. There should be a sense of order and calm. I want the children to feel inspired to learn and to create. Above all, I want them to be aware of God's divine providence, and that every fiber of our family life is touched with the light of eternity. Everything we do should be conciously ordered that we may be holy. Some days I think I am making progress, and some days all I can do is pray that God will help undo the damage done.

Venerable Zélie Martin pray for us!

Templates, High-heels, and What Really Matters

I traded in vanity for practicality. The other template which caused me to lose all my "widgets" was like a beautiful pair of high heels, it looked great but was way too much trouble. Today was one of those days... I only have a few minutes tonight so this is all the progress I'll be able to make. Check out the clock (to your left)! It isn't pretty but I thought it was really fun so I put it up for a while.

So as not to leave you without anything edifying, here is a link to a little article about Our Lady Help of Christians. Today being "one of those days," reminded me that I am powerless. God's grace and abundant mercy is the source of all the good that I have, and it comes to me from the hands of our Lady.

Auxiliatrix Christianorum

Ora Pro Nobis!

Prayer To Our Lady, Help Of Christians:

Most Holy Virgin Mary, Help of Christian, how sweet it is to come to your feet imploring your perpetual help. If earthly mothers cease not to remember their children, how can you, the most loving of all mothers forget me? Grant then to me, I implore you, your perpetual help in all my necessities, in every sorrow, and especially in all my temptations. I ask for your unceasing help for all who are now suffering. Help the weak, cure the sick, convert sinners. Grant through your intercessions many vocations to the religious life. Obtain for us, O Mary, Help of Christians, that having invoked you on earth we may love and eternally thank you in heaven.(By St. John Bosco)

And that is what really matters!

The Price of Vanity

Ok I couldn't resist playing around with my blog template and this is the price I pay. I have deleted all my "widgets" on accident, which translates into "a lot of great links" bummer. But doesn't it look pretty? Please bear with me while I piece the site back together. Hey, maybe this is good , I have been meaning to change some things and now I have to.

How We Get Through all Five Mysteries

How do I get my girls to sit through the rosary every night? Hah! I don't.

Every day we take a walk to say the rosary with the girls. We have had beautiful weather and the walks have been especially enjoyable. This is the fountain we pass by. If they pay attention and pray well, then by the time we get to the fountain they can splash in the water.

This is so much easier than saying the rosary inside. The baby is happy with things to look at, and the girls get out their extra energy while praying. I know children should learn to sit quietly and sometimes you just have to battle through so they learn, but we get that opportunity every Sunday at mass. Plus, by walking, it ensures every one stays awake (including me), avoiding prayers like, "Hail Mary Mother of God pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death amen." Yeah, you know what I am talking about.

My oldest daughter can say all of the prayers of the rosary now except the Creed. Once she gets the Apostle's Creed memorized and can tell me what all fifteen mysteries are, she gets her very own rosary in a little pouch. And of course it will have to be sparkly. As for miss Two, she gets a few words here and there, but her real accomplishment is walking quietly and letting everyone else pray.

Sickies

I haven't had much time for blogging lately. Sadly my kids seem to keep circulating a virus. My four-year-old didn't want to play today. She is never like that. We went to the mall because it was raining. There is a cool playground there and the girls love to run around in it. She just sat on the bench wrapped in a blanket not wanting to go home and not wanting to play. I had to take her home of course. It breaks my heart to see her just lying on the couch.

She keeps complaining about her stuffy nose and I can't get her to blow it. Puffs had some tips which I thought were kind of helpful.

Please pray for us, we need to be healthy because it really has been a while. What's more is my father-in-law, who we are temporarily living with, recently had surgery and should not be exposed to sickies. I don't know how to keep my little ones from spreading it to him. Little kids have no concept of spreading germs. I'll tell my oldest not to kiss the baby and she says ok but then sticks her finger in her mouth. I think she is starting to get it since I won't let her within two feet of the baby now.

I would like to write so many things and spend time surfing all those great blogs out there. But I need to stay healthy, so I should go to bed.

Speaking of "healthy"...I have another blog called Healthy Momma, Happy Momma. I wanted to be able to track my progress back to my fit and active self after having my third child. In addition I joined the May Day Weightloss Challenge which is a fun way to have accountability. You should join if you have any weightloss goals.

Are Chapel Veils "Worth It"?

Our Lady of Good Counsel of Genezzano - Ora pro Nobis!

I think that chapel veils are beautiful and I love the tradition of wearing them in church. I must admit however that after the ninth time of pulling mine back on to my head, trying to get the little bobby pin through the tiny hole in the lace while balancing a five-month-old on my hip, and telling my oh-so-helfpul and oh-so-loud toddler that "yes I know my chapel veil fell off, again," I start to wish it wasn't such an important custom. But the fact of the matter is that it is very important.

The other day my husband got a question on his blog which he forwarded to me to answer. I am glad he did because I needed to remember why I keep struggling to put the chapel veil back on.

The lady, who I will call Mrs. E, wrote:

"You state on your blog you welcome questions, I have one for you: Please explain and clarify the issue of chapel veils for women. I know they went by the wayside after Vatican II, but I came across a pamphlet that says VatII never said anything about chapel veils and any woman that doesn't wear one is sinning.

Does the Church even have a "policy" about veils? Are we or are we not to wear them?? I for one would love to wear one, BUT to wear one at this stage at my parish would be a huge distraction for everyone - not to mention I believe it would bring down a world of persecution on my head. I'm not willing to undergo this if the wearing of the veil is not really necessary."

Here is my response:

Dear Mrs. E,

I can sympathize with your not knowing whether to wear the chapel veil or not. I usually go to the latin mass where it is the norm; however I sometimes attend a Melkite church (eastern-rite Catholic) and it is not the norm there. I have decided to wear it whenever I enter a church.

In your email it seems your main question is whether or not we are required to wear the chapel veil and whether it is a sin not to. Although it seems the two are one and the same, I think there is a distinction.

Up until 1983 the Code of Canon Law (1262.2) required women to wear a veil in church. We cannont judge the culpability of those many women who did not wear a veil, because there may have been circumstances that reduced or eliminated their culpability (such as ignorance of canon law or a misleading pastor), but it was however required of Catholic women. At that point in history it was very clear that for those informed, not to wear one would be a sin.

The new Code of Canon Law promulgated in 1983 makes no mention of the chapel veil whatsoever. It seems that it is no longer a "requirement". Unfortunately I have heard arguments, from priests that I respect, both that we are to refer to the previous code on issues not mentioned in the new one, and that only what is in the new code is binding. I know this just seems to confuse matters, but it goes to show the debate is still out. As a laymen however, we are not expected to be experts in canon law; therefore to follow what is in the new code seems to be a reasonable course of action.

For me, I feel it is a "better safe than sorry" issue when it comes to whether or not it is a sin not to wear one. In these troubled times (pardon the clichés), it is often difficult to tell the sheep from the wolves (sorry again). What I mean is that the omission of the rule from canon law may be a way that those who have agendas contrary to the Church have found to undermine it without explicitly doing so. After all, most women left their chapel veils at home because they were under the erroneus impression that the customs of the church were relative to the customs of the world and time. In other words, what St. Paul said in 1 Cor. 11 "But every woman praying or prophesying with her head not covered, disgraceth her head..." (read the full text if you can) was only relative to that time and, had he been writing in our time, he wouldn't have dreamt of mentioning what many feminists would call "chauvinistic" customs.

But this is not the way of the Church, for Her truth, God's truth, transcends all time. God has written creation in such a way as to reveal to us His truth. The veil, as St. paul explains, is a physical representation of the natural order that God established by making woman subject to man. And even more importantly it is a physical representation of the supernatural order that God has established with his Church, which is subject to Christ. If the term "subject to" immediately causes a feeling of injustice to well up within you, as it has in me many a time, take a deep breath and try to consider the issue from a "pre-feminism" point of view. Because of original sin there has always been an abuse of the natural hierarchy. No doubt men are not always just, and they do not always protect and cherish women as they should. However this is to be judged by God and has no effect on God's design. Read Genesis and you will see that this natural hierarchy was established even before the fall of man. God in His wisdom established a "system" that allowed the family and society to flourish. Moreover, the fact that woman is subject to man requires man's utmost love, care, and concern for her (i.e., he has a tremendous responsibility). At the same time, God created the most effective metaphor for Christ's love for the Church and the Church's love and submission to Christ.

Because St. Paul took time to ensure the Corinthians followed this tradition in order to preserve this physical representation of the natural and supernatural orders, and because the Holy Ghost took time to inspire the Church to include these instructions in Holy Scripture, it seems prideful at the least to assume it does not apply to us now.

Essentially the veil accomplishes three main things:
1) It is a symbol of the natural order--i.e., it represents woman's subjection/espousal to man as well as his duty to love, cherish, and care for her.

2) It is a symbol of the supernatural order--i.e., a woman wearing one represents the Church's subjection/espousal to Christ.

3) It is a symbol of womanly virtue--especially reverence, humility, and piety.

In your own spiritual life, the veil, aside from allowing you to follow what has been a binding catholic tradition for over 1000 years, will aid you in ordering your senses to a more God-centered participation in the liturgy of the Church.

As to the issue of being a distraction to others I would say let them be distracted for a moment. It is worth it (for you and for them). Under normal circumstances it would be a means to reduce distraction in church by way of covering up a women's hair and thereby allowing people to pray more intently. Now it will initially be more of a distraction than your beautiful hairdo yet it is a distraction that would cause people to be more concerned with showing reverence within the church. In addition it will be a means by which you can be a witness for the restoration of a reverent liturgy and even a restoration of the family because, as you may fear, people will ask.

I would suggest you visit "Tradition in Action", a website aimed at the restoration of Catholic culture and the traditional Latin Mass. This address will take you to a page in the site that has two very worthwihile articles on this topic.

http://www.traditioninaction.org/religious/d000rpCustomsMainPage.htm

I think you will find they do a far more thorough job at explaining the need for the return of this important Catholic tradition.

By wearing the veil you will be a much needed symbol of womanly virtue and piety.

God Bless,

Hilaire

If you are looking for a place to get a chapel veil you will find some here.